Advice for dealing with my girlfriend's parents about a hickey?
Let me start by saying that her parents aren’t allowing her to go out with me. We are both 17, turning 18 in April and in May. They were a little unsure about me at first but our friendship has grown. There was a point in time where it seemed like we would never be allowed to be alone, but that quickly passed. They did mind at first if I took her home and no one else was in the car but they’re okay with that now.
But, now there is a problem. I gave her a hickey on her neck on New Years Eve. She was at the store with her dad this morning & he did not notice until then. From what I hear from her best friend (who was and is still with her), her dad was pissed but he seems alright now. I am worried more about her mom.
So what should I do? Are they more mad about us kissing? Or are they more mad about not knowing what we do when they are not around? Possibly both, but if we reassure them that we will not have sex, do you think things will get better & they will trust us when we’re alone?
Don’t give me shit about hickeys being immature and tacky. I know some people think that way, but get over it and help me with my problem.
Well I planned on talking to her parents about the hickey but they believed that it was just a burn from her straightener. I talked to them about dating her and they are fine with it. Everything worked out and I won’t delete this question because maybe someone going through a similar situation needs these answers. Thanks everyone.
Tags: amp, best friend, dad, friendship, hickey, mom, new years eve, parents, point in time
April 13th, 2011 at 2:36 am
hickeys are so immature, you need to grow up
April 13th, 2011 at 2:36 am
It will blow over. Put it somewhere they won’t see next time!! lol
April 13th, 2011 at 2:36 am
Until you’re old enough for other stuff, I wouldn’t do anything with her that you wouldn’t feel comfortable doing in front of either of your parents. That way, you won’t get into any trouble!
April 13th, 2011 at 2:36 am
Talk to her parents. They know you guys are young and have those feelings and probably that you have done some things when they weren’t around.
They will be okay, just make sure you really don’t mean any harm. They’re worried about their little girl.
April 13th, 2011 at 2:36 am
All you can do if they bring it up is apologize right? Not much else you can do and hopefully you learned to not leave hickeys any more and if you do she learns to use makeup to hide it!
April 13th, 2011 at 2:36 am
I would just let it blow over. They are probably disappointed, not mad. Parents like to think that they raised smart kids who know they should spend their time studying and praying and stuff, not making out with their b/f or g/f. It’s a generation thing. If they tell you about it, I suggest you just sit there and take it. Tell them it will never happen again and let it go. You are both practically adults, they need to realize that too. I can’t believe you are still giving hickeys at 17!
April 13th, 2011 at 2:36 am
when I was a teenager, my Dad once wanted to kick the Sh!t outta me when I came home with hickeys.
April 13th, 2011 at 2:36 am
They are probably mad that you two are engaging in more intimate activity than they were aware of, and that you made it so obvious to them (giving a hickey is about as rude as making out in front of someone).
Take the mature route and own up to your behavior. Call/write/talk directly to her parents and let them know that you apologize for upsetting them, and that you want to assure them that your intimacy with their daughter is mutual and respectful and does not go beyond kissing (or whatever level you two are at, be truthful here). Assure them that you respect your daughter and you would never have more intimate relations with her until you are both consenting, ready, and legal adults.
This sort of honesty and promise is far more impressive than just hiding and waiting for it to blow over.
April 13th, 2011 at 2:36 am
You might as well go ahead and confront her father about it—reassure him that you meant no disrespect to her or to her family. That it was a one time thing, when yall were caught up in the moment of parting–tell him that u really respect his daughter, and that you arent pushing her to have sex or anything like that-that you really are concerned about both of your futures and wouldnt do anything to jepordize that. It was a mistake and it wont ever happen again. Normally once you get the dad under control he can get his wife to understand…But go to her mom and apologize for doing something that they dont agree with and reassure her that u understand how they feel about the situation and it wont happen again!!!
April 13th, 2011 at 2:36 am
Right now technically under the law you are injuring a child. If you have sex with her it is statutory rape whether she consents or not. If the parents wanted to get tough with you they could press criminal charges against you and file a civil lawsuit against your parents. Where would that put you? You would definitely be on the road praying for yours and her 18th birthtday. A hickey is technically an injury to the skin. They could charge you with assault if they really wanted to escalate this. What should you do? Be careful about your fun. And if you do have sex use a condom pal.